Usually the Mickey and Amelia show on Baltimore’s 98 Rock (a morning show for people who don’t do mornings) is a good piece of theatre, and at the least is enjoyable while you sit in bumper-to-bumper traffic in evening rush hour. But there was a spot during today’s show that made me so enraged that I had to do something about it, and since I’m too gutless to call in and complain, I’m going to tell you what happened.
There is a bit of a lead up here. Mickey and Amelia were discussing the top 50 conservative songs of all time (don’t ask, I tuned in when the argument was already going on) and number one was The Who’s, “We Don’t Get Fooled Again.” At that point the conversation turned to discuss how on Earth The Who, the most anti-conservative band ever, could possibly have a song that would crack the most conservative list. Anyway, at one point, Amelia said something along the lines of, “Yeah, The Who’s drummer was the most anti-establishment guy… you know the guy who died from choking on his vomit.”
Two things that ticked me off instantly here: “That drummer from the Who” is KEITH FREAKIN MOON! How can you work at a Rock station and not know who Keith Moon is? Isn’t this the equivalent of working in the baseball Hall of Fame and not knowing who Joe DiMaggio was? Second, Keith Moon died of a drug overdose; it was Led Zeppelin drummer John Bonham who died of asphyxiation. Now I guess if you don’t know who Keith Moon is, it’s not unreasonable that you don’t know how he died, but again, get your facts straight.
So now I’m a little worked up, but I’m not ready to call the station and rant and rave or anything. Then the following happens: a producer walks into the studio and says that Steve McNair is going to sign a contract with the Ravens (the first time I heard this news). Since 98 Rock is the new flagship station for the Ravens, everyone in the studio starts talking about how great the signing is and starts predicting how well the Ravens are going to do next year. Now I knew this was coming, everyone starts yelling out numbers like “12-4”, or “Super Bowl Champions” which are so preposterous that you can’t really take seriously. All is fine, even my rage from the Keith Moon mishandling is subsiding, when Amelia drops this bombshell: “Ok I’m going out on a limb… undefeated…. I know it’s a stretch… How many teams have gone undefeated? Four or five?”
At this point, I nearly choked on my sandwich and swerved into an oncoming trashcan. Let’s get this straight: it’s a Rock and Roll station that’s going to broadcast football games, and you don’t know a) who Keith Moon is and b) that only the ’72 Dolphins have gone undefeated?! That’s beyond inexcusable. After that, listening to Mickey’s analysis that the Bengals were a one-year wonder and that Roethlisberger had already peaked really touched my nerve. There is no way that the Ravens are making the playoffs next year. Here’s why.
Cinncinati and Pittsburgh both finished 11-5 last year, Baltimore finished a distant third at 6-10. Now, John Clayton (an analyst who I trust) says that McNair is worth another 2-3 wins on his own, and that’s not that hard to believe. I mean you’re upgrading from the worst quarterback in the league in Kyle Boller to a former NFL MVP. Never mind that I can’t remember the last year that McNair played when he wasn’t injured (imagine if you’re a Raven fan: you are one McNair concussion away from Kyle Boller season again) but we’ll give the Ravens the benefit of the doubt and give them the extra three wins, which puts them at 9-7. I’ll even buy into the fact that the Bengals are going to slump between their enormous success last season and the uncertainty of Carson Palmer’s leg injury. So I’ll dock them two wins just for that, which also sticks them at 9-7. I still see the Steelers winning the division at 11-5 even if Roethlisberger has a “junior slump”.
Now do you really think that 9-7 will get you in the playoffs in the AFC? No way. Think of it like this: the Steelers, Pats, Broncos, and Colts will all likely win their divisions again. But that leaves the Dolphins, Jaguars, Chiefs, and Chargers who all finished at 9-7 or better last season. If you don’t think that two of those teams aren’t finishing over 10-6 you’re crazy.
And remember this: the Ravens finishing 9-7 and is all contingent on the following things happening: Steve McNair doesn’t get hurt and plays like it’s 2003; Jamal Lewis remembers what its like to be a premier running back; Ray Lewis gets younger; Todd Heap finds some receivers to take away the double teams AND a rookie defensive tackle (the position that busts the most often in the NFL Draft) anchoring the defensive line. Anyone of those things doesn’t happen and it’s right back to 6-10.
Like I said, no shot.
Chris DiIonno is a regular contributor to DCMS. He can be reached at .
